


Sincerely, A Fellow Muggleborn

by Searching4UFOs



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Advice, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Muggleborn, Post-Battle of Hogwarts, Severus Snape Lives, The Quibbler, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-24
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 08:00:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24347626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Searching4UFOs/pseuds/Searching4UFOs
Summary: The Quibbler Classified:Ninny Knows All21 April 2000pg. 34Dear Lost Muggleborns,Have you just been introduced into the magical community and find yourself at loss with this new world? Do you still have questions after your representative from the Ministry of Magic’s Muggleborn Introduction Initiative came to visit? Are you having difficulty finding the answers you seek in the recommended reading?I know how confused you must be feeling right now and as my favorite muggle author once wrote, DON’T PANIC! You are not alone. I’ve been in your shoes before, so I understand how you might be feeling.Please feel free to owl in your questions to Ninny with the Quibbler. As a new segment coming to the magazine, Ninny Knows All will act as an advice asking column where anyone can ask questions about the magical world and I will do my best to answer them.Sincerely,A Fellow Muggleborn
Comments: 7
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 01

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!
> 
> I'm a long-time fan fiction reader, but this is my first time posting. This story is the result of all my random question about the magical world in the form of an advice column. I'm not entirely sure where this story is going, but I'm committing to at least five chapters minimum and I shall update once a week.
> 
> I have been really nervous about sharing because I'm self-conscious about my work. So, please be kind.

**The Quibbler:**

**Ninny Knows All**

**23 May 2000**

**pg. 20**

Dear Lost Muggleborns,

Thank you to everyone who submitted questions via the owl post. I was happy to see a few people interested in this new column. I shall do my best to reply to all questions promptly. Feel free to continue sending in your inquiries!

The very first letter I opened was from an anonymous person. In their letter, they asked whether or not they have to get their childhood cat, Meowseter Yoda, fixed before coming to school. Anonymous expressed concern about Yoda making more “pur-dawans” while they were there.

What a great question Anonymous! I had a similar one when I first got to Hogwarts and saw several students with their pets, so I spoke to the gamekeeper (and later Care of Magical Creatures professor), Hagrid. He was under the assumption that everyone got their pets from Diagon Alley, where shopkeepers already cast the charms that would spay and neuter animals per the Ministry’s strict breeding laws. 

At the time, I did a little light research into the issue. To my surprise, it never seemed to occur to anyone until recently that muggleborn students could have brought pets from home. Thankfully, the library had the report on the investigation where ninety-nine percent of the students who brought their pets from the muggle world already had them fixed.

Unfortunately, there was an exception to this in the form of one unlucky Hufflepuff who brought her male cat to school two years before I started. According to one of the fifth year prefects at Hogwarts, at the time of my impromptu inquiry and who just recently re-confirmed the story for me, the student had been eating breakfast and minding her own business when the caretaker, Mr. Filch, burst into the great hall with her cat gripped by the scruff of his neck.

Much to everyone’s amusement, Mr. Filch demanded to know who the cat belonged to. When questioned by a nearby professor, Mr. Filch reportedly explained that Mrs. Norris (his much-beloved cat) was pregnant and that Hufflepuff’s cat was the perpetrator. The student obliviously appeared mortified when the came clean and was immediately insulted by Filch, but the man later apologized to the student once he calmed down.

After the event precautions were taken so all incoming pets would be inspected upon their owner’s arrival. If the pet is found to be un-fixed, letters would be written home. In most of these situations, the parents would simply give their permission to go ahead and cast the charm. However, there are rare occasions where the parents request the animal’s return.

So, to answer your question Anonymous, if you want to bring him with you to school, then yes you will have to get him fixed. If you want him to have kittens later on, then I'm afraid that you will have to leave him at home. I hope this helps you and anyone else who might have been wondering the same thing. Thank you for asking!

Sincerely,

A Fellow Muggleborn

P.S. I can happily report that Mr. Filch is enjoying his retirement with Mrs. Norris and her grand-kittens.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Again!
> 
> Here is the second chapter! I am so excited to be sharing this with you. I know it's not much nor is it life changing work. I just wanted to write something light and fluffy for the soul. These are some dark times, so I hope everyone is doing alright!
> 
> Also, in my rush to post last week, I forgot to mention that I own absolutely nothing.

**Owl Post Delivery**

**To: Ninny with the Quibbler**

**27 May 2000**

Dear Ninny,

I just found out that I am a witch and I will be starting Hogwarts this autumn. I wanted to ask Professor Longbottom when he brought my letter and introduced my family to the magical community, but I lost my nerve and was too embarrassed to go through with it. He seemed like such an intimidating person.

It wasn’t until he took us to Diagon Alley that I regained my courage. That is when I saw your ad in the Quibbler and decided to write.

So, does Hogwarts have snow days? I live in a very remote area and occasionally there will be so much snow that it is impossible to go anywhere. Thank you for all your help. I’m sorry if it’s a stupid question.

Sincerely,

Ellie

**The Quibbler:**

**Ninny Knows All**

**30 May 2000**

**pg. 22**

Dear Ellie,

I would like to start by congratulating you on Hogwarts! I know this world might seem scary and confusing, but I’m sure that you will come to love it.

Unfortunately, Hogwarts does not have snow days or any other time off (barring the regularly scheduled holidays, school-wide petrification, or a flaming goblet’s ridiculous tournament). As it is a boarding school, there is nothing to impede a student’s ability in getting from one class to another as they are housed underneath the same roof as the dorms. Even if it snows when a witch or wizard is traveling home for the winter holiday, there are many other options such as the floo (fireplace travel), side-along apparition (teleporting with a licensed adult), or taking a port-key (a device that teleports you) to get back to school. The magical community takes its education very seriously. It is also worth noting that the train and tracks are charmed to accommodate all types of weather. I hope this answers your question.

Also, you should never feel embarrassed about reaching out to your professors with questions as long as you remain respectful. I can tell you from experience that they like when students approach them and, based on personal experience, they’ve probably heard every question imaginable. I know they may seem intimidating at first, but it’s important to remember that they were once students like you and they are there to help guide you.

With his permission, I can tell you that feelings of uncertainty or a lack of knowledge are not strictly associated with being a muggleborn. Professor Longbottom, a pureblooded wizard who grew up in this world, had several difficulties when he first started school. Magic was just as new to him as it is to people like us. So, it's safe to assume that other witches and wizards, regardless of blood status, who have grown up in the magical community have found themselves at a loss somewhere along the line. They just may be better at hiding it.

Thank you again for reaching out to me with your question. It was very brave of you and it takes a courageous person to admit when they are embarrassed. I wish you luck with your first year of school. Welcome to the magical world!

Sincerely,

A Fellow Muggleborn


	3. Chapter 03

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> I do not own anything. I am so happy to be sharing the third chapter with you today!

**Personal Owl Delivery**

**To: Ninny with the Quibbler**

**31 May 2000**

Dear Ninny,

I am very proud to inform you that my son is going into his fourth year at Hogwarts. Unfortunately, this is also a very difficult time for our family. My husband has been in and out of the hospital this last year. While my son has an owl that travels back and forth between us, I’m concerned that something could happen overnight. I don’t want to wait until its to late to say goodbye to his father.

Is there a faster way that I can reach my son? He mentioned something about ‘floo’ but I’m not sure I understood what he meant by that. Any advice that you can provide would be very helpful. Thank you.

Sincerely,

A Worried Mother

**The Quibbler:**

**Ninny Knows All**

**06 June 2000**

**pg. 19**

Dear Worried Mother,

I cannot imagine what you must be feeling, but please know that you have my deepest sympathies.

To answer your question, yes there are other and faster ways to communicate with your son besides an owl. The floo is a simple and efficient way of getting in touch with others, but I would not recommend it for you during this difficult time. It requires a fireplace that must be put on the Ministry of Magic’s Floo Network. The process is long and extensive as you would need to apply directly to the Department of Magical Transportation. It would then need to be linked to the school’s network, but the board of governors is very strict on who can have access. As a parent, you understand the need for making sure your child is safe.

Honestly, I think the perfect way to communicate with your son is to use a coin or an object, large enough to be written on, spelled with the Protean charm. It allows messages to be passed between the linked items. It even warms to let the owner know they have a message, though the spell can be adjusted to make a small noise instead. There are several shops in Diagon Alley, and other magical equivalents, that have people who specialize in the charm. Of course, they do charge a small fee but it is much more reasonable considering the time and costs of other services.

Thank you for asking, Worried Mother. I hope this helps answer your question. If you need any more help or just an ear to listen, please do not hesitate to reach out.

Sincerely,

A Fellow Muggleborn

P.S. I intercepted your son's owl after receiving your letter and have sent a set of charmed coins. I included the instructions in the box. The spell should hold until the winter holidays, but by then I will need to re-cast the spell.

**The Quibbler Advertisement:**

**Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes**

**06 June 2000**

**pg. 35**

Why would you risk getting caught with notes in class when you can use Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes newest product, **_Worrier’s Warm-Ups?_** It’s the perfect way for friends, star-crossed lovers, and future mischief makers to keep in contact.

Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes has combined several spells, some of which are downright diabolical, to ensure that you won’t miss out on a message. So, worry not worriers and get your warm-ups today!

Discount on Worrier’s Warm-Ups if you bring in this AD!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Stay safe during this difficult time!


	4. Chapter 04

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to not only my mother, but all the people missing their families in this difficult time!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!  
> I am so sorry for missing yesterday's deadline. I've been very homesick for my own mother which is the inspiration for this chapter. Due to the COVID crisis going on, I have been in quarantine with her for months. Unfortunately, there has been a family emergency and she had to go out of town. This situation has in turn transfigured me into a complete mess. I'm sure there are many other people in similar positions, so I wish them all them best.
> 
> Without further adieu, I deliver onto thee the next chapter. 
> 
> P.S. I do not own the Harry Potter Universe.

**Owl Post Delivery**

**To: Ninny with the Quibbler**

**12 June 2000**

Dear Ninny,

I am about to start my first year at Hogwarts. I know that this is supposed to be an exciting time in my life. Even my friends are talking about this as if it’s the next great adventure, but I’m scared. I have never been away from home for longer than a couple of nights.

My biggest worry is being away from my mum. She’s my best friend and has been all my life. I don’t know how I’m going to handle not seeing her every day or just being around her. I know this probably makes me sound like some blubbering baby. I wish I could ask my friends for advice, but they would just make fun of me.

How do I cope with this new change?

Sincerely,

L the Half-blood.

**The Quibbler:**

**Ninny Knows All**

**14 June 2000**

**pg. 33**

Dear L,

It is completely natural to be feeling this way right now. Homesickness is not just about missing home. It’s also a longing for the familiar and comforting. Many people experience this when they are somewhere new and without access to the comforts of home. The trick to coping with this is just to take it one day at a time. If you try to count down the days until you go home, then you're going to make yourself miserable or even more upset than you already are. Plus, you won’t get to enjoy your time at Hogwarts and miss out on all the good that comes with it. While I don’t agree with your friends making fun of you, they are right about this being the next great adventure. So, don’t fear the next chapter, but instead, relish the opportunity that will be presented to you.

It’s still perfectly okay to miss your mother. There is nothing wrong with that at all. From what you said, it’s obvious that the two of you are close. Thankfully, you will be happy to know that Hogwarts does offer a family day once a month.

It was instated after Hogwarts was rebuilt after the battle in 1998. Many parents were concerned about their children’s safety once schooling returned to normal, so Headmistress McGonagall created a visitor’s day. This became so popular with the parents and studies revealed that it also boosted the students' morale that she decided to keep it. Most magical parents know how to take part in this new tradition by flooing or apparating to Hogsmede, but I feel like I should explain it to the muggleborns’ parents as well. Letters will be sent out two weeks before the annual family day to notify them and to get a headcount on who will be attending. Then, parents will be expected to go to the Leaky Cauldron in London where they will floo to the Hog’s Head Inn. Once there, a member of the faculty will be waiting to lead them up to Hogwarts.

I hope this answers your question and helps you (and others) feel better about going away to Hogwarts. Thank you for writing to me.

Sincerely,

A Fellow Muggleborn


	5. Chapter 05

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is there a sex education class at Hogwarts? I wonder what it would be like.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Fairest Readers!
> 
> I apologize for the lateness in this chapter. I was originally intending on the last chapter to be more serious, but I thought it would be nicer to end this story on a lighter note.
> 
> I still can't believe that this is the end. I never actually finished a fan fiction (or a story) before in my life. Even though, I was late the last two chapters and this is just a series of one-shots. I'm still very proud that I didn't abandon this piece. 
> 
> Now, onto the story, I had this idea in my head (especially after watching the youtube video where Severus Snape teaches sex education). It was done by BuzzFeed (in case anyone else wanted to watch it).
> 
> I own nothing. Thank you so much for reading! I appreciate you stopping by!

**Owl Post Delivery**

**To: Ninny with the Quibbler**

**22 June 2000**

Dear Ninny,

My daughter is at that very special age where she’s only got one thing on her mind: boys. While her father and I have had the talk with her over summer break, we are unsure if we have covered everything. We are both muggles and neither of us is a biologist, so we’re unsure if a witch (or wizard)’s biology is different. My husband, who is currently leaning over my shoulder as I write this, would also like to know that if being a witch suddenly makes her adverse to romance (I know it’s a silly question (how does he expect the magical community to be what it is if there isn’t sex), but I thought I’d humor him).

Also, regarding the topic of sex, will there be a health class covering those topics with students, or does this need to be addressed while she’s at home? Are there any books that cover this area if the school doesn’t address it?

My husband and I appreciate any help that you would be willing to provide.

Sincerely,

Concerned Parents

P.S. My husband wants to know how the school is preventing teen pregnancy.

**The Quibbler:**

**Ninny Knows All**

**24 June 2000**

**pg. 12**

Dear Concerned Parents,

Thank you so much for asking. My parents had similar questions when I was at that age. Unfortunately, they were too embarrassed to ask at the time. However, they were happy to learn that students do receive a health education during the fourth year. Witches and Wizards are just the same as muggles.

It was a very standard course, though I cannot speak for the males. We had Hogwarts’ healer Madam Pomfrey (a type of physician), lecture and teach us the proper charms and potions as a precaution. I will reach out to a few friends who might be willing to share the male’s perspective.

As to your husband’s final question, Hogwarts has not had any issues with teen pregnancy to my knowledge. There can be exceptions to rules, but none while I was a student.

I hope this helps answer any questions people might be having!

Sincerely,

A Fellow Muggleborn

**The Quibbler:**

**Ninny Knows All Part 2**

**24 June 2000**

**pg. 13**

Dear Concerned Parents (but really this is for worried parents hellbent on protecting their child’s virtue),

There is a perfectly good reason there haven’t been teen pregnancies while attending Hogwarts for the last two decades. That reason is Professor Snape.

He teaches the male side of sex education and he is terrifying. No one, and I stress this, wants to be on his bad side. The man’s a dementor trapped in the human form. He should be given the Order of Merlin for his ability to knock sense into the male population’s head.

When I first started dating my girlfriend (now wife), her father gave me the shovel talk that would generally frighten most people. However, all I could think about (at the time) was Professor Snape in his black cloak and the grim look in his eyes as he taught us to be respectful and considerate towards our partners.

If he’s still half as terrifying as he was when I was a student, then you need not worry about uncouth boys acting like hormonal maniacs.

Sincerely,

Anonymous Male Student (who is still heeding all of Snape’s valuable lessons and does not live in fear of being on the receiving end of an unforgivable curse).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can anyone guess who this "Anonymous" wizard was? Brownie points for right answers.
> 
> Thank you again for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!


End file.
